Friday, March 30, 2012

Brain fart solved the two pixel problem.

But first, an addendum.

Remember awhile back when I was bitching about going slower than the posted speed limit? I got my panties in such a wad I forgot a few things. Like getting stuck at red lights because of these slowpoking dumbasses. I haven't done any scientific surveys to see if I stop at red lights more often when doing the speed limit or when I am being held up below the speed limit. What I do know is that it is it is extremely frustrating when I am forced to stop when the guy in front of me seems to think that slower is safer.

States spend incredible amounts of my tax dollars to figure out the maximum safest speed for all the roads. More than likely the speed limits are much lower than they need to be, but that is beside the point. However there are those that think if 55 is safe, then 50 is safer. If 50 is safer than 55, then 45 is safer all the more! That is unless there is a guy yapping on his cell phone, adjusting his radio, texting, sexting, eating breakfast, lunch, or dinner and might actually be doing the speed limit coming up behind the guy thinking that 35 is the safest of all.

This really is insane: once again I am coming to a light that is in the process of of turning red. It's bright orange for all the world to see. I'm going to stop of course, I have plenty of space. The light turns red and the guy in front that caused me to have to stop at the red because he was going much slower than the posted speed limit blows right on through.

That's one for the Huh? Files.

This too has me scratching my head: guy was doing 45 in the 55, we come up to a section of road that is now 45. He slows to 40. I would like to get around him, but can't because some other non-driving pinhead passed by me, caught up to and then slowed down and perfectly matched speeds with Ax. A few more miles down the road Smash decides to make a turn and I can finally make my great escape. At this particular moment in time the speed limit is dropped to 35. I drop to 35 thinking that the guy will drop to 30. Seems logical. He was going 45 in the 55, then 40 in the 45. No, he continues to do 40 blowing right past me.

Now this is the pièce de résistance: Once again I'm behind some bitch doing 40 in the 55. I can't get around him because it's a two lane highway and there is plenty of all the oncoming traffic. Of course I get stuck at the red light. So does Crush. This particular intersection is usually my salvation. It splits into five lanes. A center turn lane and a right turn lane. However this right lane can also go straight across, but it ends and remerges back into the left lane about a block past the intsection. Many the time I have used that lane to get my marry ass down the road. Not this time. The light turns green and I floor it, so does asshole. He blocks me from getting around him. Were up to 50 by the time the lane ends so I have to drop back down to prevent him from wrecking me! He then he slows right back to 40. MOTHERFUCK!

What was that about two pixels? Screw it, I'm all pixelated now. Some other time.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Hey! People! That's NOT a turn lane!

There seams to be quite the enemademic as of late. As I write this, a couple of days ago I'm driving up to an intersection. This particular road is four lanes one way, I'm in the far right lane about half a block away and I can see a guy in the left lane next to mine stopped at the red light. I can see that the cross traffic lights are changing, I travel this road almost everyday so I know that by the time I get to the intersection my light will have turned green. So I keep doing the speed limit which is thirty-five MPH. My light turned green about a couple of seconds before I got there. The guy in the left lane decides to make a right turn right at that moment. Just before I pass by him.

Granted, none of these lanes are marked as turn or straight through, but stupid me, I rely on common sense. Common sense tells me you can't turn from an unmarked lane that far away from the corner. Common sense tells me I should just go down to the next intersection to make my turn. Common sense tells me to be in the correct lane long before. Common sense tells me to check this nifty new invention called a rear view mirror.

That was the inbound downtown lanes, a couple of hours later I'm a block over on the outbound downtown lanes. It happened again. This guy, I 'll grant him maybe he's new and not familiar with how the traffic pattern goes, must have figured he was in the wrong lane and tried to get into the correct lane at the last moment. However in doing so he left his ass hanging out in my lane. So I have to stop two car lengths away from the light AND have to wait for him to move all the way into the his lane BEFORE I can go when the light turns green. The light turns green, I watch him move all the way into his lane, then make a left turn at the intersection cutting across a lane of traffic and almost getting t-boned.

There were two more intersections that could have been utilized to make that turn.

A few months ago I'm coming up to a red light. I'm in the straight across only lane and a guy is in the left turn only lane. I'm thinking that my light should turn green right about...NOW! And, it did as I was right behind and to the right of the guy in the left lane who changed his mind and pulled into my lane.

About a month earlier I need to make a left turn. These lanes are clearly marked as left turn only, straight across only, and straight across or right turn. The light change pattern almost always goes like this: first the turn lanes go green, and then straight lanes. It can mix up depending on if there is any traffic sitting at the lights. Say for instance there is no traffic across the street, all three lights will turn green on one side. If there is no turn lane traffic, then just the straight lanes. This day, as usual, all the lanes on each side of the intersection are fully loaded.

My turn left only light goes green and I take off, the guy next to me takes off too and cuts in front of me. I'm on the horn warning the guy I'm about to t-bone him. He's on the horn too, apparently warning me that it was his turn to turn. That I was the one in the wrong. You see, that's the thing that bugs me most: these people really must think that it is the job of everybody else to move aside for them. Their attitude is such that if they get hit, it would have been my fault. They make no move what-so-ever to avoid an accident.

In each instance my overwhelming desire to NOT wreck my vehicle took over and I avoided having to spend hours on end filling out police reports and insurance paperwork. I like my vehicle, it's almost paid off, and I'm not interested in getting another to replace it. Also, I have more than one ready to go, and I have family that can loan me an extra car or truck.

My driving philosophy is that I don't just drive for me, I drive for everybody else. I try to anticipate what is the stupidest possible thing someone can do at that moment. I have to admit I am constantly caught off guard because there are those whose mission it must be to out-stoopid even my predictions.

Because of this I have full coverage, accident forgiveness, and new vehicle replacement.

Friday, March 2, 2012

All 3 Signs Say “Speed Limit 55.”

There's this section of road I drive down most everyday. What drives me nuts is the fact that there are a bunch no driving idiots that can't seem to do the speed limit. I'm not talking about the Speed Racers that do do 65, 75, 90 MPH. That's a story for another time. This fire breathing rant is for those morons doing about 45 MPH.

One thing I noted is that most speed limit signs today don't have the initials MPH anymore. My thought is that government is trying to save money by cutting that bit off. Of all places for government to save money. Then they spend that savings for overhead reader boards that are never turned on. Like that one day I drive under three of these things. Then go around a bend in the road and am presented with several inches of packed snow and ice. No warning what so ever. The guy in front of me slows form 65 to 30. I was about a hundred feet behind him, that was barely enough space for me to slow down in. About a mile up the road there were a couple of cars that got tangled up and all kinds of wreckers, cop cars, and fire trucks are on the road. In my mirrors I see coming up behind are some big rigs. A couple of them I had passed earlier with long trailers and doubles. Fortunately a couple of more miles up the road the road cleared right up.

So the government saved that tax payers money by cutting off the “MPH” on the speed limit signs. My first thought coming up behind the slow pokes in front of me is to say “Hey! The sign doesn't say 55 KPH.” Looking at my speedometer I find that can't be the case. 55 KPH is right across from 35 MPH. The idiot is doing 45 MPH and we're on a section of road in which you can't pass them.

Now to set up how frustrating this is I need to go into a few details of how this highway is constructed. It was built back when the population of my state was equal to what the population of my county is now. The highway starts out as a two laner, but you can't pass by anyone because there is so much oncoming traffic. However it is pretty rare to get behind a slow poke in this section. For some reason most everybody find it capable to do 55.

Then the road splits into three lanes. One of which is a center turn lane. In my state it is illegal to use the center turn lane to pass someone. Right at the point where the road splits is a sign that say “55.” The guy in front of me slows to 45. It's almost always 45. Sometimes it's 40, but rare occasions it's 35. (No comment about coming from a metric country because this person was doing 55 a few seconds ago.) You may say that these people probably turned off one of the cross roads and they didn't see the speed limit signs. Getting caught behind a slow poke that did join traffic from another road is common, but those roads are all 35 MPH. These dumbasses insist on doing 45. Even though we have just passed yet another “Speed Limit 55” sign. Remember we are in a section with no hope of passing. Unless he decides to make a turn by slowing to a complete stop and then getting into the center turn lane leaving his ass hanging out in traffic.

Now comes what you would think be blessed relief: a four lane split. Two lanes in my direction, I can now pass the turd munching moron. I move into the left lane and as soon as my back bumper is equal to slow poke's front bumper, all of the sudden shithead wants to do the speed limit. Sticks right there blocking me from moving back over.

Or becomes a total asshole by suddenly speeding up to a whole lot faster than me and speeds down the damn road. Or in some cases becomes a motherfuck by slowing back down below the speed limit when I move back behind him.